Attention anybody and everybody who bothers reading my posts on Mondays because you like to know just how poorly I'm handling menopause day in and day out! I won't be posting Menopause Madness Mondays anymore. As some of you may already know, I've recently been informed that I am not menopausal. I am depressed. Good to know, huh? I mean, wow, if the doctor hadn't told me I was depressed, I might have mistaken those night sweats and hot flashes for more phantom symptoms of perimenopause and geez, wouldn't want to do that, now would I? So in an effort to get my hypochondria under control and to perk myself up out of my newly diagnosed depression, I will no longer jabber on and on about my faux menopause. Instead, I plan to go sit in a corner and contemplate the many sad little facets of depression that I must learn to deal with...you know...stuff like the heart palpitations, the anxiety, the mood swings, the brittle nails, the tender boobs and of course, those old "depression standards", the aforementioned night sweats and hot flashes. I mean, yeah, sure...I was already dealing with all of those things, but that was when I thought they were the result of the "Big M". Now that I know it's really depression that's got me all twisted up, well now, that's just a whole different ball game, isn't it? I've got to re-think everything, obviously! For example, I simply must learn to stop smiling and laughing every day...because it kind of makes this depression condition seem more like a bi-polar disorder, you know what I mean? 
Oh, I was never so depressed then when I heard you were depressed. If what you have is depression I need to go back some years and redo them. How old did you say that ??Doctor?? is. Next time you need to ask for a lady doc. How can a man especially a young man know anything about a WOMAN ? Remember to take your chocolates with you to the corner. They are very calming. Love ya WOMAN, Donna
ReplyDeleteOkay Kari..Im worried here. Im seeing myself in your post.Now am I having Pre M or Depressed. I bet it is both. hehe
ReplyDeleteI'll just bet, if you ask Dr. Doogie, that depression can cause changes in your periods too. Probably even make them stop completely if you get "down" enough!!! This guy needs to write for a medical journal; he obviously has discovered a new side of depression that only women experience!!!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with that "depression" thing--be careful tho, Dr. Doogie may stick you in the Snake Pit (ever see that movie????)
ha ha ha ha ha
Hmmmm -sounds like you need to start writing "Depression Mondays".... but then it might be just one tear jerker after another and I'm getting rather fond of your wacky sense of humor.
ReplyDeleteOh please don't tell me I have to suffer this mental-pause by myself?! Okay, now I'm depressed...so hey, if we're both depressed, we can still complain together! Oh, now I feel better.
ReplyDeleteHugs!
Kat
Mentalpause! That Kat, she's so funny and nailed it, apparently.
ReplyDeleteI think you should go with a completely different ailment entirely. Like...arthritis or acid reflux.
Love,
Julie
I am so glad to see you back. I had packed my teleporting gear (you know, the coffee cup, the cane and my sweater) and had contacted Scotty to "beam me up" when I decided to come in and check once more and Thank you thank you, I see those crazy depressed eyes staring back at me. Guess I can unpack now, huh?
ReplyDeleteI always get a laugh when you write about the big M oh, excuse me your depression! Take care, Stephanie
ReplyDeleteWell, it had to be a guy doctor to tell a menopausal woman she was depressed, no woman doc would be so stupid and if it was a female doc, I'd be looking for another one...
ReplyDeleteOh...me...oh...my...no wonder I feel so bad...I'm DEPRESSED, never would have quessed that in a million years...yea...I would like to depress some crazy doctor that told you that! Actually I would like to take his head and put it in a wine press...OH NO! Even better put his head in a mamography press...that'll do the trick...after all he's the one who seems to have nothing, zilch, nada in his head but hot air...we need to check it out on some type of xray film...you know...just in case he can be saved from his own ignorance AND for all the other women who may use him as their doc...ok...sorry...I'm ranting...but that really makes me mad! However, I also get mad at MEN or DOCTORS who blame everything on hormones or menopause...geez...how many times do we have to be the brunt of that joke...she must be PMSing...or OH!! dont' mind her she is going through the CHANGE!!! Really, you need to ignore those chest pains...b/c I'm sure your just experiencing menopause....well, OK then...somebody RUN A TEST and let me know for sure...quit all this quessing...GEEEEEZZZZ...my heart is racing just thinking about that...can't SOMEONE just run a stinking TEST!!!! Other than just saying...oh yes. your approaching the age of menopause AND...I do notice some vaginal dryness...and your breast tissue isn't as dense as it once was (well, that makes me FEEL really special)...then he proceeds to tell you all about these new vaginal creams so you can enjoy your PARTNER on a more intimate level...yeah...leave it to a male doctor to only be concerned about vaginal dryness...MEN! I want some relief from the daily "heat" strokes, the night sweats, the feelings of claustrophobia?, the mood swings, the crying jaunts, the dry skin....the dreaded weight gain...around the waist...in other words...yes...I want to be the same sweet supple partner that I was for my husband this time last year...but I can deal with that on my own...THANKYOUVERYMUCH...it's the other STUFF...give me something...REALLY! Men...and Men doctors who THINK they know women...sheeeessshhhh!
ReplyDeleteOH...MY...I have gone on quite the rant...hmmmm...I think it's that depression thing again! I'm telling you...it's just grabs me at the most odd times!!
Think we're going to have to come up with a new title...maybe "Talk about IT!!" Tuesdays...then we can sneek any topic in that we want...including PHSYCO docs!!
Blessings...and remember to take your St. John's Wart...it works on depression I hear...lol
Teresa
***disclaimer****...My husband is NOT one of those men...thank the Lord...just wanted to make sure no one thought I was ranting on about something he may or may not have said...he's actually very supportive...maybe he should go for his medical liscense...seems he may be a step ahead of some of the docs out there!****
Girl you keep on smiling that big pretty smile of yours. Find you a new female doctor. Here's hopeing you have a great night. Mary
ReplyDeleteI only have one thing to say Find a nice 50 year old female doctor to treat your depression!!
ReplyDeleteOMGOOOOODNESS....Kari...I just found out something you need to know...just saw it while channel surfing on the ole TV...waiting on hubbin to arrive home...yea...ok...all my chores are done...
ReplyDeleteAnyhoo...this is BIG really BIG...I just saw a show...entitled ITV...according to their guest...one Donny or Danny Viarra...the cause of dry skin, breakouts, irritability, forgetfullness, bloating, fatique, and DEPRESSION is because you are either A).CONSTIPATED or B). backed up with TOXIC chemicals...most likely caused by CONSTIPATION! Yea...and if you'll just call a number and order some of his wonderful product (not yet approved by the FDA...surprise) you should be all better in a few weeks or maybe even days...yes it is called "Almighty Cleanse" (what a clever marketing strategy that is)...it does the trick...according to Quack...I mean Mr. Danny Viarra...yeppers...you can THANK me later...once you order this stuff...and feel ALL BETTER...then you can go see DR. CRAZY-AS-A-LOON...and tell him he's full of crap...then offer to let him borrow or possibly have for a nominal fee some of your Almighty Cleanse...that should fix his problem, too...
Just thought you would want to know this valuable bit of information...AND can you believe I mentioned vaginal dryness AND constipation all in one day...on your comments...geez...hope I haven't offended anyone...
Good luck...lol...hehehehe
Teresa
Hello dear Kari:-) I'm back from my trip and trying to play catch up with everyone...I feel like I've been away for a month instead of just a few days! lol I've read all of your posts that I had missed...I was so saddened to read about your little grandson Conner, I have a little gravestone with my baby's name on it also. Love the idea of the little mailbox you can put notes in:-) I'm still laughing at that young doctor's "depression" diagnosis!! Does he have a lot to learn! xoxo
ReplyDeleteWell shoot! If it's not the "Big M" then you shouldn't be depressed at all because you have sooooo much to look forward to!
ReplyDeleteDo you think you could pretend for those of us who truly are depressed AND menopausal?
Hi Kari...just stopping by, to see how your depression is coming along!;-)
ReplyDeleteI need to catch up on your other posts, too...will be back tomorrow!
Pat
Hi Kari,
ReplyDeleteAh come on, no menopause monday? You know I need to know I'm not the only one in this boat. But I'm probably just depressed also. Loved Teresa's comments also. I think we should get together all of us bloggers who are in various stages of menopause and go after that doc, that outta scare him to keep his mouth shut. Nothing like a bunch of menopausal(sorry, depressed) women coming coming after ya.
You know you really need to give that doctor a piece of your mind and your foot his behind. Then maybe he can be "depressed" for a while with his achy body parts and anxiety. What a nerd!
ReplyDeleteWOW! I bet that if you went to at least three different Dr. you would have three different diagnosis for those night sweats and hot flashes.
ReplyDeleteAin't life grand when you mix in the medical profession and add a dash of salt.
Have a simply wonderful day in your world.
Hi Kari-sorry I'm so behind on my blogging-work is hideously manic at the moment! Can't believe your doctor is saying it's depression! You know your own body better than anyone, and it's so frustrating when doctor's make these snap judgements!!! Huh, that's what I say!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, hope you are feeling a bit better today, and no cooking do you hear me? I've heard it can actually trigger depression and mood swings...xxx
I think I would tell that doc to hit the road, and then go get a second opinion from a female doc.
ReplyDeleteOh come on...keep up the MMM just for kicks...what do ya say?
ReplyDeleteHey you could call it "Misdiagnosed Monday's"!!
Love YOU...have a great day!