Everyone familiar with the phrase "Can't see the forest for the trees"? That's kind of how I've been feeling. I'm experiencing some serious issues, for lack of a better word, and some moments it feels like I'm missing details because I'm so overwhelmed by anything and everything else. I don't know if there truly are some momentous problems in my life or if the menopause is just making me absolutely flippin' nutso. And, while I never thought I'd feel this way, I'm really voting for the menopause at this point. lol I used to rant and rave about things when I was unhappy, but I've come to realize over the years that people don't like that, do they? So now I tend to kind of keep things to myself because I don't want to be a pain in the butt or a downer or just a plain ol' whiner. I tend to avoid talking to people when I'm unhappy. But I don't know if that's the right way to do it. All I've managed to accomplish this week is to deprive myself of the friendship and companionship of all of you that I've been blessed with recently, plus I've upset my oldest son because I couldn't talk to him the other day and guess what? I'm still not feeling any better than I was. So. I'm still searching for answers, I'm still feeling somewhat lost and confused and I'm still wondering what I should do to make some positive changes in my life. But what I'm not doing is forgetting to thank all of you for your kindness and your comments and your thoughts. It helps more than you know to hear from you all. I owe each of you a response to your kindness and I will give it. But first, I'm afraid that my motherly duties call. I've got to go pick up one of my kids from school for his ortho appointment. I wanted to get this post and the ones showing what I've been doing these past few days on my blog before I left, though (mainly so my aunt won't call me with horrible threats of bodily injury if I don't post something soon!lol). Thank you all again for your warm thoughts. I appreciate them more than I can express.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Confusion Reigns Supreme at My House (or in my head, at least!)
Everyone familiar with the phrase "Can't see the forest for the trees"? That's kind of how I've been feeling. I'm experiencing some serious issues, for lack of a better word, and some moments it feels like I'm missing details because I'm so overwhelmed by anything and everything else. I don't know if there truly are some momentous problems in my life or if the menopause is just making me absolutely flippin' nutso. And, while I never thought I'd feel this way, I'm really voting for the menopause at this point. lol I used to rant and rave about things when I was unhappy, but I've come to realize over the years that people don't like that, do they? So now I tend to kind of keep things to myself because I don't want to be a pain in the butt or a downer or just a plain ol' whiner. I tend to avoid talking to people when I'm unhappy. But I don't know if that's the right way to do it. All I've managed to accomplish this week is to deprive myself of the friendship and companionship of all of you that I've been blessed with recently, plus I've upset my oldest son because I couldn't talk to him the other day and guess what? I'm still not feeling any better than I was. So. I'm still searching for answers, I'm still feeling somewhat lost and confused and I'm still wondering what I should do to make some positive changes in my life. But what I'm not doing is forgetting to thank all of you for your kindness and your comments and your thoughts. It helps more than you know to hear from you all. I owe each of you a response to your kindness and I will give it. But first, I'm afraid that my motherly duties call. I've got to go pick up one of my kids from school for his ortho appointment. I wanted to get this post and the ones showing what I've been doing these past few days on my blog before I left, though (mainly so my aunt won't call me with horrible threats of bodily injury if I don't post something soon!lol). Thank you all again for your warm thoughts. I appreciate them more than I can express.
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You know, it's a good thing you don't change your phone number to an unlisted one cause I've been known to fly where ever it is I'm needed, before!! Glad to see you back out amongst your people...and I too vote for the menopause...you don't know what all you can blame on it, just don't go robbing any banks and trying menopause as a defense...I believe it's been tried before, without success
ReplyDeleteLove ya, little girl
Aunt Sandi
You know what I think, Kari?, I think sometimes we need to go it alone, just to process what we're going through.
ReplyDeleteAfter a while, it's time to get out there and share the pain with some trusted folk, just to get it off your chest.
And noone else can dictate when you'll be needing to do those things for your healing, except you!
I think you did exactly what needed to be done, for you!
Yay Kari-you're back!!! I've missed your daily dose of humour like you wouldn't believe (but didn't want to make you feel pressurised into coming back before you're ready!!!)!!
ReplyDeleteNow regarding your 'cookie confession'-because you're back and I've missed you,I wouldn't mind if you told me you'd turned into Martha Stewart in the kitchen, as long as you promise it was just a momentary abberation!!!
Seriously, I'm so glad you're starting to feel better enough to post a comment on your blog, I've been thinking of you every day. Don't feel bad for feeling down either, we've all been there, and understand how it feels.It sounds like it could be hormonal, doesn't it? If only you could come on a trip to the U.K.-that would be such a tonic wouldn't it (more like a gin and tonic in my case lol!!!)Maybe one day!!!
Hope you get things sorted with your son, and remember us bloggers are always here if you need a chat!
Lastly, have a fab, fab 'special' day tomorrow!!! xx
I'd say you got a lot done - and just having an organized, clean, and awesomely (is that a word?) decorated house should help a lot. You rock! and I'm glad your back - I love reading your posts. Your humor blesses me.
ReplyDeleteHi Kari,
ReplyDeleteOoh I'm sending you a B-I-G hug from across the pond.I feel down too and I can't seem to pick myself up.
I hope you soon feel happier,I wouldn't have hormones for a gift !!!!!
Caroline Ingalls and Ma Walton were just too good to be true,they could solve anything,I much prefer you,funny,witty and down to earth and in touch with your world.I'm sure your son will understand.My eldest boy and I never stay mad with each other for long.
Kat xx
Oh,I forgot to say that when my mum was menopausal she had HRT patches and one of them got stuck to my dads back somehow when they were in bed(!!!***!!??@@**)he wore it all day at work and was as daft as a brush for days when we finally discovered it and took it off.My mum says it was the highlight of her menopause !!!
ReplyDeleteOh Kari...I do think it is menopause. Really I do.I have always let things pile up on me and then I got so down about myself and everything and one else. I was a mess...and when something really worrisome happened, I lost all sense of myself. Then I got sick...really sick. My male doc kept putting me on one antibiotic after another...but then Hallelujah! I wound up with a female doc one night in the ER. She became my saving grace. She and a wonderful psychologist at the base were so helpful to me. My hormones were totally out of sync and my always over the top anxiety level was turning into a Tsunami. I began Paxil and talked with both of these docs every week and I am truly another person. As far as worry and depression and anxiety goes. Most of it I could not help and what I could help, I worked on. LONG struggle...
ReplyDeleteI have no idea if any if this info could help you but please know how much I care. When I had this happen to me, I found out that so many people I knew had the same issues. We women are pretty hard on ourselves.
Boys (and men) have a hard time understanding us. My son and husband are learning but it has taken 3 years! Grace instinctively seems to know...a girl thing!
I wish I could hop on a plane and head out to Texas. Or you pop over here to Ohio. I do send loads of hugs your way...do not beat yourself up over this. I just think it is all normal and part of this delightful game called menopause.
Also, as stay at home Moms, we often feel like our jobs are over when the kids grow up...then we are left with the what do I do nows...
normal too!
If you ever want to talk or email. let me know...I care. Heck fire girlfriend, we all do!
Your are such a bright light and bless us all with it, and your delicious humor, daily!
I will be thinking about you!
Now that I have written a book here and rambled on to your other readers great nausea, I will head off to bed. You get some rest and do not be so hard on yourself!!
Hugs,
Sue
I heard Blogger Rumor that we were singing Happy B'day. Where's the party?
ReplyDeleteOh the joys of menopause! Damn menopause is more like it!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you're posting again. You were soooo missed.
Putting your feeling down helps, I know, so just rant on sister! We're all here to listen and give you love.
Hang in there sweet friend.
Hugs!
Kat
Hey Girl!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you are starting to feel a little better. And why is it that our family members need us to blog so much? They can just talk to us!!)
I totally get the need to hunker down and be alone when you are upset about something. Sometimes you just need to be able to work it out on your own terms...
Yeah, hormones are the pits! They make me have crazy thoughts too. I don't like being manipulated by them.
ReplyDeleteHi Kari, just found your blog, don't know much about the menopause just yet but if my hormones are anything to go by i'm up s*** creek without a paddle, I always find a good weep and then talking it through with friends always helps. Hope it gets easier for you soon, Best Wishes this day from Anniex
ReplyDeleteHi Kari
ReplyDeletefirstly you should consider any woman my age an expert on the subject of the menopauseand talk to them.
Do you have "well women" services in USA. You can go and get checked out and get some advice regarding all the changes that both physically and emotionally happen to you as you go through the menopause. You don't necessarily need to have HRT. There are other things that can help.Get some help.
I think everyone who needs support from their blogging mates should be allowed a weekly rant. We, of a certain age, have been there. Do not let it rule your life get some help. I promise it will make you feel better.
Now talking about certain ages a little bird has told me that it is YOUR BIRTHDAY today. I'm singing Happy Birthday as I write. Now aren't you glad you can't hear!!Every birthday is a reminder that we havent finished what we want to achieve and should be celebrated.So have a great day and just think of all your friends over the world sending their best wishes to you. Happy birthday from the Uk Mary, Simon, Sarah, Sophie and Michael xx
Hello Dear Kari!
ReplyDeleteI've just been catching up with what you've been doing. First...Happy B'day!!
Being one of the "senior" bloggers around, I will assure you...it is most likely menopause you're feelin'! I'm sure I frightened and dismayed my husband and children many many many times during those years. Their happy go lucky wife and mommy, was often someone else!! I absolutely love Christmas and it was that Holiday, that sent me into the worst tailspins!
I really feel for you and know what you feel. As Mary suggested, there is help out there. Perhaps a GYN check up, will give you some answers.
I had a total and complete, yes the big one, hysterectomy in '99. That was after years of ups and downs. I was given hormones to get me through. I know longer take them. There are avenues other than hormones.
I wish you so much love and luck through this time in your life.
Pat
Hi Kari,
ReplyDeleteSo glad you are back! I'm sure it has to do with menopause also. Don't worry about bothering me if you want to talk. I'm not doing much of anything and am here if you want to talk. Was it your birthday? Happy Birthday!!
A little bird told me it was a special day today...so....HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARI!!!
ReplyDelete